So your best mate is a Linden?

Now as much as I enjoy talking about slights on different country's, I am not actually racist, I can take a joke (something a lot of people in SecondLife lack). But I draw the line at serious racism intended to be insulting...



SO



One day as I'm wending my merry way through a Simulator El Secundo I'm suddenly informed that a mate of mine is being subjected to indecent racism of the lowest kind. SAL TO THE RESCUE! I get on my cape and boots and I'm off another do-gooding mission. So I confront the racist and give them some friendly words of advice and I'm given the old usual response,



<---"I KNOW a Linden and he's getting a call!!!" Yeah Yeah Yeah, heeeeaaaard it all before. Seems this time I may have laughed too early as I was subsequently banned less than 30 seconds later. YES 30 seconds. And it was an hour later that I received an email informing me an investigation had gone underway into my banning. Cards on the tables ladies et gents - I got banned BEFORE the investigation? That seems a little strange no? So I collect myself, finish up explaining to the missus and taking an ass kicking and get on writing a ticket to LindenLabs to review my ban. Problem -



1.) Three days later I receive a reply telling me that Basic Account holders cannot ask the specific question of "Why am I banned?" So I go back rephrase it to "My account won't log on". I rub my hands together with childish glee and anticipate a response.

2. "We've reviewed the "investigation", all is in order"



Pull the other one mate, you know, it really pisses me off when someone gets away with SecondLife murder, which we call "orbiting" because they "know" a Linden. Well I met Teddy Sherringham don't see me crying about it.



Example Numero Zwei



One fine winter's day myself and my bride to be were running people over with a Hobo train, my wife isn't banned, someone knew a Linden and I was.



My wife left a rezzed platform on someone's land, she was banned a day, I was banned three days...hmm yes



Seriously Linden Labs employees are more corrupt than a Nigerian police officer. It makes me sick to the bottom of my nacho filled stomach.



Sal's words of enlightening advice - next time someone tells you they know a Linden, tell them so do you.

Ignore the ring - try it.

So while relaxing on one of the many poseballs with the missus -(this can range from anything like a sitting pose to full blown out 69'ing in a cardboard box) - it is not unusual to be approached by (struggles to not use the word noob) a "newer" individual to El Secondo Lifo that has not yet had the indulging experience of burning a hole in their badly texturised trousers. And that doesn't mean buying Gothic thrones and annoying dances, no we're talking good clothes and something that will contribute to upon being first seen, either, "5 days old, really!" or "Armidi is shit go to Muism you fuckin idiot you're so last Tuesday!"

Back to the point -

I spent a lot of time and effort arranging my Second Life marriage and hunting for the perfect ring (I think I asked the whole shop to help me agree on one, team effort ;)) and I'm always very proud to see my Mrs Cooljoke standing there looking pretty with her lovely ring clearly visible on her ring finger -

I re-iterate - CLEARLY VISIBLE

So when a "newcomer" approaches my delicious wife with the hopes of sparking up a date on a scripted swan or some fun with a prim penis I find it highly insulting that they ignore the ring I strived so hard to buy (as if the Mrs Cooljoke tag wasn't enough - it's ok they're usually French and can't be expected to understand my higher plane of intellect).

I think what is more insulting is an IM like this though -

[18.22] SecondLife Cunt: Ring don't mean a thing

^So they even noticed and are trying to backslide me like a slippery eel off a Chinese fish market. Well not today muggins. It's highly amusing to see someone try chat up your missus, while you're both on voice together, for even more laughs, encourage her to play along then jump on voice and lay a torrent of abuse on that good for nothing crayon.

[If the above doesn't amuse you, try making a female avatar and pretending to be lesbians with your wife, then get on voice and bust out a Barry White tone, they'll run like an old drunk with a walking stick]